Category Archives: Just Sayin’

10 things I should be ashamed of … but I’m not

10. My blood feud with Michael Cera For years, the very sight of actor Michael Cera has launched me into a blind rage. When I see him in commercials or in magazines, I immediately want to bully him. I’m compelled … Continue reading

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Five signs the end is near: February 21, 2013

The meteor that slammed into the Chelyabinsk region last Friday must have seemed like something out of a Michael Bay movie to the poor Russians who witnessed it: loud, bright, fast and utterly incomprehensible. And like the first Transformers movie, … Continue reading

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Def Black Riot: The Great Rock ‘n’ Roll Swindle

Or: “Al Stewart, Tenacious D and the beginnings of my freelance writing career” Tenacious D, the mock-rock duo comprising actors Jack Black and Kyle Gass, announced recently that they’re looking to host Festival Supreme this October, a kind of Lollapalooza … Continue reading

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Five signs the end is near: January 2, 2013

So Dec. 21, 2012—the date the Mayans supposedly singled out as the end of the world—has come and gone. But here in the scary, post-Mayan Calendar landscape of 2013, we face no shortage of troubling signs about the future: North … Continue reading

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Tranquilizers, hair metal, ocelots and Farscape: My checkered family history

Editor’s Note: The following text is a lecture on tranquilizers written and performed for Syllabus: Animal Husbandry on Wednesday, Sept. 26. Syllabus is an offshoot of Write Club Atlanta in which six guest “professors” each present a seven-minute “class” on … Continue reading

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Fighting against the darkness

In the hours immediately following the July 20 shooting spree in Aurora, Colo., it felt like Sept. 12, 2001 all over again. The horrific murder of 12 innocents and the injury of more than 50 others brought a nation together—united … Continue reading

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Five signs the end is near: March 24, 2012

5. Turtle Nation Gets Up in Arms Having turned the dumbest property in ‘80s toy history into a blockbuster film franchise, Transformers director Michael Bay is now turning his attention to the second-lamest property: The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Wait, … Continue reading

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Five signs the end is near: March 14, 2012

5. Mississippi, Alabama outdo themselves “Why do birds fly upside-down over Mississippi?” “How do you keep an Alabama girl from biting her nails?” You’ve heard all the jokes (especially if, like me, you were raised in Louisiana). But don’t think … Continue reading

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Five signs the end is near: March 8, 2012

5. The Osbournes are coming! The Osbournes are coming! It’s not bad enough that Sharon Osbourne can be seen each weekday morning cackling with other hens on a pointless knockoff of The View, or that no one questions why marrying … Continue reading

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Saint that a shame

The New Orleans Saints warmed the hearts of underdog lovers everywhere with their thrilling victory over homeboy Peyton Manning and the Colts during Super Bowl XLIV. These days, however, they’re the talk of the sports world for a number of … Continue reading

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